Adapt to Thrive
Life. It can throw you a curve ball.
Okay, I know nothing about sports and probably should shy away from metaphors involving anything athletic, but you know what I mean. Just when you think you’ve got things figured out, BOOM!
I am an adoptive parent of twin boys. We have recently been thrust into the world of “special needs”. I have never liked that term as it seems to serve as a catch-all for a myriad of things. Nevertheless, it is where we are at in life right now. I have decided to claim their recent diagnosis of ADHD as a spiritual gift.
I now have more compassion for parents of children with special needs, and am learning to give myself some grace, too. I also have a new appreciation for single parents. I have an amazing husband and partner, and don’t know how single parents navigate special needs in addition to being both mother and father to their tiny humans.
I salute you!
My kids struggle with coping skills and it can come out in the form of rage and tantrums that, when seen in public, can cause a 66% increase of birth control usage. I have never felt so helpless in my life!
I also can’t believe how hard it is to find help.
Why isn’t there a Tinder for Therapists? All these dating sites allowing for shallow connections, but no easy way to find specialized help? Didn’t Elon Musk just launch a Tesla into space? Some things just should not be difficult.
All of this has made me realize how adaptable women are.
How we flex to meet the needs of our kids, and put our own on the back burner. How we need to let go of our own expectations, plans and purposes and adapt to what our current circumstances have thrown at us.
Part of adapting means not grieving things too long. If you clutch your grief like a badge of honor, you will grow bitter. You will become toxic to those around you if you remain in that place too long.
Adapt to thrive.
I used to binge watch Project Runway. I loved every time Tim Gunn would check in on the competing designers. Time would be running out and Tim would utter three profound words,
“make it work”.
I have stolen this mantra more times than I count.
In fact, you’ve probably done this more times than you realize. In those moments when your child had a blow-out diaper in the car and you still managed to make it to church on time. Or when you were between paychecks and managed to make your family a nice dinner from what you had in your pantry.
You make it work every day. You adapt.
Beauty can be found in our hardest times when we remember nothing has caught our Lord by surprise. I find it easier to adapt when I think of His faithfulness – how He has never failed me.
His grace is sufficient.
Jenny is a textbook extrovert, Pastor’s wife and adoptive mom of twin boys. She leads worship for Elementary and Middle school students each week in chapel services at a Christian school, and loves speaking as well. She is a a contributor on the Portland Moms Blog, and also writes an article called Everyday Heroes for Tigard Life and Tualatin Life newspapers that celebrates people serving in her local community. She likes donuts, making people laugh and changing her hair color almost as often as she changes her mind. Follow her misadventures.