He promises comfort Blessed Are Those Who Mourn

Posted by Julie Widman on January 27, 2017 in Faith, Happiness, Julie Widman

A blanket of fog covered the road in front of us as I drove my kiddos to school this morning. As the sunshine was bright behind us, we drove into the cloud—it was dark, hard to see, and there was a stillness that permeated us.

In a recent podcast, Andy Stanley said:

“Parents are only as happy as their saddest child.”

His words devastated me as I listened; I knew this statement to be valid. I had lived out this devastating truth and had experienced the depth of the fog that comes with unhappiness—the deep, dark, quiet fog of a sad child.

Sadness can roll into life, slowly, quietly, and almost without notice.

It can stay for a stage, a season or a series of seasons. When the sadness of a child settles in and sticks like the thick fog it has the tendency to make life feel dark. Even though the sadness was not mine, slowly it swallowed us. It became hard to see the light…it was quiet, isolated and lonely. This sadness, at times, felt like a death; like it captured and killed the child we knew. Nowhere was the joy, the laughter or the light. The fog was deep, thick and dark; it was full of fear, shame, isolation and heartache.

“Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.” Matthew 5:4

Yet, this mama bear didn’t mourn. I “manned up.” I tried to put on my “big girl panties” and attack this thick fog that threatened to engulf our family.

Did I cry out?

No.

Did I share the struggle?

No.

Did I mourn my lost child?

No.

This fog felt private.

This fog had the words “mental health” and most people can’t handle those words. This struggle wasn’t really my struggle, yet it was, so I battled knowing what was my story to share with my responsibility to protect my child from receiving or feeling judgment. So, I put on a happy face, made the appropriate phone calls and marched forward.

In my own strength things got done. Like a novice explorer, I guided my child through the fog to this new land. Counselors, medication, therapy, and coping strategies…we circumnavigated the mental health world. There was improvement but no comfort. The foggy days turned to foggy weeks and eventually foggy months and I callously moved through the time.

My heart was hardened, my joy extinguished, and my hope wavered by the cold, icy cloud of my child’s depression.

Then it happened. Finally, I mourned.

I mourned the death of a normal childhood. I mourned the brokenness of this world. I grieved over the isolation the enemy pushed me to. I was devastated by the hardening of my heart, I cried out in fear and let the sadness overcome me. I mourned it all.

I mourned and then began to go to God in mourning; honest with my sadness and disappointment with the fog.

His Word became alive, His spirit moved, and slowly His soothing balm of love and truth and light washed over me.

Kyle Idelman would say I came to “the end of me.” I came to the place where there was nothing left that Julie could do to fix or help the situation. The fog was too deep, too thick, and there was nothing I could do that would change that. But, His comfort did change things! I was able to love through the fog, I was equipped and strengthened to have joy in the fog and I was peaceful and not sad even though there was still sadness in my house.

“Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted”. Matthew 5:4

Our family is currently out of the fog. That said, it can roll in at any moment. Now I know when we see the thickness and the darkness approaching, I start in a place of mourning. Mourning is not giving up, mourning is not weakness or acceptance of the situation.

Mourning postures me to receive God’s comfort.

It sets my mind, heart and eyes on Him. Mourning reminds me who the Great Comforter is. And, in the fog, in the sadness, something impossible can happen. Happiness and joy can spring forth and flow out of the sadness.

I don’t know what you need to mourn for today. Maybe you need to mourn for a child, for yourself, for a friend or family member, or for this world. I invite you to mourn, let it go, experience the relief of mourning!! Because the promise is true—and there is a promise here; a promise that there will be comfort. Comfort will come after and through the mourning. God comforts those who mourn. They will be blessed. Don’t miss this promise. Do not miss this blessing. He will comfort you.

The fog is thick, don’t get stuck there. Let yourself mourn—comfort, light, love, peace, and strength is waiting.

I would love to pray for you if you are in a place of mourning today. I would also love to rejoice with you if God has comforted you through a season of sadness.

Julie WidmanPlease share your thoughts in the comments.

— Julie Widman

4 comments... (add a comment)

  1. Molly

    Julie great post. You are right it is a process. We go into classic mom mode to fix it but we do better to turn to God, the Man!
    Great to read your stuff
    Cheers Molly

  2. Pat Lightfoot

    Dear Julie,
    All these years(50+)of struggling and trying to stay strong to help my son and it never once occurred to me that in mourning God’s comfort would be available. Your words were a balm to my heart. In always seeking help for him I failed to realize how deeply I needed God’s comfort for me. Thank you for sharing.
    Pat

  3. Dear Julie,

    Thank you. I am 36 years old, with an irritatingly perfect husband (: and two boys who have me wrapped around their little finger. I am blessed. My mom passed away a year ago this April. I have been beating myself up because I have days where I am just weepy and sad. This to me is weakness and shows I am not doing my wife job or my mom job very well. I miss my mom with an ache so deep. Your words hit home with me. I just realized I have not taken the time to mourn my loss. I am good and pushing it aside, but I have not given this up to my wonderful God.
    Thank you. Thank you for seeing the gift God has given you and actively using to help others. You are amazing!

    Blessings to you and your family,
    Heather

  4. Beth Maley

    Great Story, my question is always this,
    Why do we not come as a family together with our pains and brokenness in our church? I am a frime beliver that the power of prayer togeather as a group heals! seen it have watched it work. Its real! We are all broken, different ways, yet broken. I belive when we step forward and ask for our brothers and sisters to pray WITH US right know right here. lives are changed. Our Lord Jesus only wants the best for us, always. The bad the good the ugly.

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